If your oven looks as if a roast exploded inside every Sunday since 1999, here’s a tip: start a blog. I guarantee that oven cleaning will shoot up your to-do list, along with power washing the deck and exercise. I cleaned my oven just this afternoon by way of not writing this post. In a recent poll of three, respondents groaned and/or acted out hari-kari at the thought of updating their blogs: an albatross that would make the Ancient Mariner feel like that bird was just a bird.
I’m sure there are impassioned bloggists out there, those who can’t wait to share their every thought with the world, or at least friends and family guilted into reading their posts. These same folks are always sharing stuff on Facebook, Instagram, and every other social media site with a “like” feature. But I’m only in the blog game because my web designer told me to. I get her logic: as a content creator (web patois for writer), potential clients expect a blog. Sigh.
I just took a break to watch “baby goats in pajamas having the time of their lives” on Facebook. It was posted by a friend who I’m pretty sure was at work (possibly tasked with updating the company blog). After five minutes of watching the goatlings cavort I took a grammar quiz and aced it—I’m one of the one-in-50 Americans who can identify 50 (ludicrously easy) mistakes. It doesn’t say much for the 49-in-50 others, or my ability to focus.
Where was I? Procrastination is a useful tool when it comes to oven cleaning. It’s not helpful when you’ve got a blog post (or white paper) due in the morning and you’re down at the Rent-a-Center debating the pros and cons of gas vs. electric power washers. But coming up with a good post, week in, week out; month in, month out; or in my case year in, year out is tough. Einstein proved it, evidenced by his notorious absence from the blogosphere.
So what miracle brought me to the task at hand? Answer: I’m writing a novel—the only thing that engenders a higher level of procrastination in me than a blog post. The writing I never procrastinate over is client work. It’s much easier to write for someone else—even weekly posts. Ergo, if you have something that needs writing and you’d rather stick pins in your eyes, send it my way. And enjoy that immaculate oven.